Exploding Ice Cubes TM

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Steve Vai


Hotel Illness Chris/Male/26-30. Lives in United States/Illinois/Chicago/Near West Side, speaks English. Spends 20% of daytime online. Uses a Fast (128k-512k) connection. And likes Writing Fiction/Playing Guitar.

"The woods are lovely, dark, and deep, But I have promises to keep,

And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep"





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May 2002

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09/01/02 - 09/16/02

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Making the World a Better Place      

5:27 PM

For those of you who weren't aware, I have dedicated my life to making this world a better place for all of humanity.  Yes, I have renounced my capitalistic ways and I shall now bestow my hard earned knowledge upon human kind absolutely free of charge*.  


"Well, that's great," you say, "but what exactly are the fruits of you labors?"


That, my friend, is an excellent question, and I'm glad you asked.  Step right up and allow me to tell you about my latest creation:  

Exploding Ice CubesTM.   


Now I can already hear the philistines among you muttering, "Why in the hell would I want Exploding Ice CubesTM?"


This is also an excellent question, and let me answer by asking you, dear skeptic, a question of my own:  Have you ever found yourself entertaining guests and suddenly realize the only thing you have to drink is that gallon of scotch you bought for $5.99?  

Yes.  That's exactly what I thought.  

Yes indeed, it is very embarrassing.  

Well, dear readers, I will now show you not only how to serve that economy bottle of goat piss scotch without embarrassment, but how to ensure your guest enjoy it.  


"How?  How?"


Patience eager reader.  First, you need one or more ice cube trays.  May I recommend these:

which I am making available to you at my cost

Second, you will need H2O.  Yes, plain old ordinary tap water will do.

Third, fill the ice cube tray(s) up to the top of each reservoir with water.

Place the trays (and the water) into the freezer.

Close the freezer door.

Allow the ice cube trays to freeze approximately 1 and 1/2 to 2 hours*.

Remove the trays from the freezer and gently twist the tray.  When done correctly, this will induce air bubbles into each of the cubes like this:

Return the trays to the freezer and shut the door.

Once the ice has frozen completely, simply crack and dispense as you would ordinary ice cubes.  When placed into a room temperature drink the solid (ice) and gas (air) will expand at different rates, thereby causing the cubes to shatter with profound 'pop'.


Yes, as a matter of fact, I do have a life.  Why do you ask? 



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